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Episode # 116: Dr. Taryn Marie Talks About Resilient Mindset to Thrive in Chaos

Jul 29, 2024

How do you become a highly resilient person? Dr. Taryn Marie shares the 5 practices of highly resilient people which she developed from interviewing hundreds of leaders.

✍️ EPISODE OVERVIEW

In this transformative episode of The Five Core Life podcast, host Will Moore welcomes Dr. Taryn Marie, a leading expert on building a resilient mindset. Drawing from two decades of research, Dr. Taryn Marie unveils her groundbreaking "Five Practices of Highly Resilient People" framework, offering listeners a roadmap to developing an unshakeable resilient mindset.

The conversation begins with Dr. Taryn Marie sharing a personal story that illuminates the powerful mind-body connection in resilience. She then introduces the concept of the "vulnerability bias," explaining how this mental barrier often hinders the development of a truly resilient mindset.

Delving into the first of her five practices, Dr. Taryn Marie emphasizes vulnerability's crucial role in fostering resilience. Together, Will and Dr. Taryn Marie explore practical strategies to gamify vulnerability, making it easier for listeners to incorporate into their daily lives and strengthen their resilient mindset.

The discussion takes a meaningful turn as they address mental health, working to normalize conversations around suicidal thoughts and the importance of seeking help. Dr. Taryn Marie briefly outlines the remaining four practices of her resilience framework, leaving listeners eager to learn more.

This episode is essential listening for anyone seeking to cultivate a resilient mindset and thrive amidst life's challenges.

đź“– CHAPTER SUMMARIES

1. The Mind-Body Connection in Resilience (2:30-10:00) Dr. Taryn Marie opens up about her personal struggle with debilitating back spasms, revealing how these physical symptoms were tied to unresolved emotional trauma. She explains how recognizing this connection allowed her to address the root cause - feelings of abandonment - leading to both physical and emotional healing. This powerful example illustrates the intricate relationship between our mental state and physical well-being, emphasizing the importance of holistic approaches to building a resilient mindset.

2. Understanding the Vulnerability Bias (10:00-15:30) Dr. Taryn Marie introduces the concept of the "vulnerability bias," a cognitive barrier that often prevents us from authentic self-expression. She explains how this hardwired voice in our heads convinces us that being vulnerable will lead to rejection, causing us to hide our true selves. This bias, while meant to protect us, actually hinders our ability to form deep connections and build resilience. Understanding and overcoming this bias is crucial for developing a resilient mindset and fostering genuine relationships.

3. The First Practice: Embracing Vulnerability (15:30-25:00) The discussion delves into vulnerability as the first key practice of highly resilient people. Dr. Taryn Marie explains how allowing our inner selves to match our outer selves can lead to deeper connections and better support systems. She and Will explore practical ways to "gamify" vulnerability, such as asking for help daily or starting meetings with a "Rose, Bud, Thorn" check-in. These strategies aim to make vulnerability a habit, gradually building a more resilient mindset.

4. Gamification Strategies for Building Resilience (25:00-32:00) Will and Dr. Taryn Marie discuss various ways to gamify the process of building resilience. They explore ideas like setting daily reminders for vulnerability practice, scoring oneself on resilience-building activities at the end of each day, and incorporating these practices into existing routines. This approach makes the journey of developing a resilient mindset more engaging and sustainable, leveraging behavioral science principles to create lasting change.

5. Normalizing Mental Health Struggles (32:00-38:30) The conversation takes a crucial turn towards mental health, addressing the importance of normalizing discussions around suicidal thoughts and depression. Dr. Taryn Marie emphasizes that experiencing such thoughts is a common part of the human experience and should not be stigmatized. She stresses the importance of reaching out for help, explaining that those experiencing suicidal thoughts often don't truly want to die but need support in figuring out how to live. This segment provides valuable insights for both those struggling and those supporting others.

6. Overview of the Five Practices of Highly Resilient People (38:30-end) In the final segment, Dr. Taryn Marie provides a rapid overview of her complete framework for building a resilient mindset. Beyond vulnerability, she introduces the other four practices: Productive Perseverance, Connection, Gradiosity (a combination of Gratitude and Generosity), and Possibility. While time constraints prevent a deep dive into each, this overview gives listeners a comprehensive picture of the framework, setting the stage for further exploration and application in their journey towards a more resilient mindset.

🔑 KEY TAKEAWAYS

Here are 10 key takeaways from the podcast episode, each at least 40 words long:

  1. Mind-Body Connection: Physical symptoms often have emotional roots. Dr. Taryn Marie's experience with back pain linked to feelings of abandonment illustrates how unresolved emotional issues can manifest physically. Recognizing this connection is crucial for holistic healing and building a resilient mindset.

  2. Vulnerability Bias: Our brains have a hardwired voice that discourages vulnerability, fearing rejection. This "vulnerability bias" often prevents authentic self-expression and deep connections. Awareness of this bias is the first step in overcoming it and developing a more resilient mindset.

  3. Vulnerability as Strength: Contrary to common belief, vulnerability is a key practice of highly resilient people. Allowing our inner selves to match our outer selves leads to deeper connections, better support systems, and ultimately, greater resilience in facing life's challenges.

  4. Gamifying Resilience: Making resilience-building practices fun and engaging increases the likelihood of sustained effort. Techniques like setting daily reminders, scoring yourself, and incorporating practices into existing routines can help make developing a resilient mindset more achievable and enjoyable. She also talks about fun activities to improve mental health.

  5. Asking for Help: Regularly asking for help is a powerful way to practice vulnerability and build resilience. It not only provides necessary support but also strengthens relationships and community connections, contributing to a more resilient mindset overall.

  6. Normalizing Mental Health Struggles: It's crucial to destigmatize conversations about mental health, including suicidal thoughts. Recognizing these experiences as part of the human condition encourages people to seek help and support, fostering a more resilient approach to mental health challenges.

  7. Productive Perseverance: This practice involves knowing when to maintain a goal in the face of challenges and when to pivot. It's about balancing determination with flexibility, a key component of a resilient mindset that allows for adaptation in the face of obstacles.

  8. Connection: Building deep connections with ourselves and others is vital for resilience. This practice emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and nurturing relationships, creating a support network that bolsters our ability to face life's challenges.

  9. Gradiosity: This concept combines gratitude and generosity. It involves finding silver linings in difficult situations and sharing our resilience stories with others. This practice not only reinforces our own resilience but also inspires and supports others in their journeys.

  10. Possibility Focus: The final practice emphasizes focusing on progress rather than perfection and viewing risk and opportunity as a duality. This mindset shift encourages a more optimistic and open approach to challenges, fostering greater resilience and adaptability.

🥇GOLDEN HABIT

Definition of Golden Habit:

A 'Golden Habit' is the optimal habit to relieve a pain point/replace a bad habit because it's personalized to your DNA, goals, and lifestyle in order to maximally reduce the friction to form it.

The Golden Habit should be: - DESIRABLE: Should be enjoyable and rewarding. - PRACTICAL: Must easily integrate into one's existing routines. - IMPACTFUL: Expected to significantly enhance well-being.

This Episode's Golden Habit:

While the term "Golden Habit" isn't explicitly mentioned in the podcast, Dr. Taryn Marie introduces a habit that aligns closely with this concept: asking for help once per day. This habit is discussed around the 20:15 mark. It's presented as a practical way to practice vulnerability, which is the first of the five practices of highly resilient people.

This habit is:

  1. DESIRABLE: It helps build deeper connections and support systems.

  2. PRACTICAL: It can be easily integrated into daily routines.

  3. IMPACTFUL: It significantly enhances one's ability to be vulnerable and build resilience.

Related Core Area of Life:

This habit primarily aligns with the Mindset Core. It addresses the key pain point of struggling with vulnerability and authentic self-expression, which can hinder personal growth and resilience. By regularly practicing asking for help, individuals can overcome the "vulnerability bias" and develop a more resilient mindset.

🚀 READY PLAYER ONE?

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đź«… BIO - Dr. Taryn Marie

Dr. Taryn Marie is a renowned expert in resilience and mental health, with over two decades of research experience in how humans effectively face challenges. As the foremost authority on resilience, she has developed the groundbreaking "Five Practices of Highly Resilient People" framework. Dr. Taryn Marie's work bridges the gap between academic research and practical application, helping individuals and organizations build resilient mindsets.

Formerly leading global leadership development at Cigna and heading executive leadership development at Nike, Dr. Taryn Marie brings a wealth of corporate experience to her resilience work. She is a sought-after speaker, consultant, and thought leader, known for her ability to translate complex psychological concepts into actionable strategies.

Dr. Taryn Marie's approach to resilience is holistic, addressing the mind-body connection and emphasizing the importance of vulnerability in building strength. Her insights have helped countless individuals overcome personal and professional challenges, fostering a culture of resilience in an increasingly complex world.

As an advocate for mental health awareness, Dr. Taryn Marie is committed to normalizing conversations around mental health struggles and promoting a more compassionate, understanding society. Her work continues to inspire and empower people to develop resilient mindsets, become stronger mentally and thrive in the face of adversity.

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